Welcome to Grow Authentically: an online resource and guide to help you on your therapeutic journey
Happy New Year and thank you for stopping by my blog. I am honored that you are taking the time to read these words. Allow me to introduce myself, my name is La Shauna Richardson and I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and owner of Ruth's Place Counseling Services, LLC. Yes, I'm a therapist who owns a private practice which is something I never in a million years thought I would be doing for a living. And here I am writing about it! We'll get into that more deeply in another blog. For now, let's get into what brought you to this post. It's 2023! For most of us, the New Year is a fresh start or a new beginning. For others, it may be something else completely different. And it's all love! But for a minute or two let's explore the idea of new beginnings. Even if 2022 was a great year for you, most of us still want to have a better year in 2023. But for many of you, 2022 might have even been an extremely difficult year. Was last year filled with too many lows and not enough highs? Or maybe you learned something about yourself last year that you want to continue to grow in or explore this year. Should 2023 include therapy? My answer may surprise you.
For starters therapy, psychotherapy/speaking to a licensed therapist as we currently know it is a rather new concept. When I say new, I mean it's not multiple centuries old. Your second great-grandmother was not seeing a therapist to help her manage her stress. And for various reasons psychotherapy has been viewed in a negative light and for some is still a taboo thing "only certain people" do. So am I saying to you since your second great-grandmother managed without a weekly session, you should too? Well...not quite. First, let me acknowledge, I understand as a therapist my perspective on therapy is biased at best. But please know this post or the entire blog for that matter is not a marketing campaign for my profession. Although, we still need them, thankfully due to the pandemic most of my colleagues are booked. So, if this isn't a campaign for therapy why am I writing this post? As the title of this states, think of this blog as a resource, a tool, and a guide to help you on your therapeutic journey to better...however you choose to define better! Some of you came across this blog because you're thinking about trying therapy for the first time. Great! And some of you brave souls are thinking about trying therapy again. Good for you! It can be scary and exciting all at the same time. January does that to a lot of us. The first time I saw a therapist was about 12 years ago in January. It was one of the best decisions I made and it changed my life forever (I'll share more about my experience in another post). Now, back to actually answering the question.
Should you go to therapy in 2023? Maybe!?! Yes, my real answer is maybe! Therapy is a wonderful tool to help people on their therapeutic journey. It can aid in self-discovery, healing, growth and so much more. As a therapist, I don't just listen to people's problems. Although, I don't take it lightly how important it is to just listen to people's problems. I'm not a paid friend! I DON'T give advice to my clients! Now to my friends and family, I give advice all the time! Sometimes, more often than I like to admit I offer it when they don't ask for it. Don't judge me!! I'm a work in progress too! I'm sure some of you may be thinking well if a therapist doesn't listen to your problems and give you advice on how to fix things, why see them? What do I and other great therapists do for those 45 minutes we see you? A large part of therapy is to help people sort their thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and emotions. Many times, when life is overwhelming we have trouble doing this on our own or we may have never learned how to do it at all. Many therapists call this processing and processing your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and behaviors is a very useful skill. Learning how to do this in a healthy way can help a person better understand themselves and others as well as manage their lives better. As a therapist, I also provide resources and tools so my clients can accomplish the goals they set for themselves. A common therapy goal might be feeling better about yourself, not being anxious all the time or not hating your life, or arguing less with your family and loved ones. Many times the people I work with just want things in their life to be better. Who doesn't want better relationships, careers, family, etc? As a therapist, I hold my clients accountable to the values, behaviors, and actions-steps they created as their goals. And sometimes, that can result in them creating a greater sense of the meaning of their life. Often at the very least, there is inner healing that takes place. What I found is after my clients learn therapeutic skills and are able to implement them consistently in their lives they experience more peace and joy. And as a therapist, I am honored to be a part of their process and cherish being chosen to assist in guiding them. And even with all that amazing stuff happening, I still believe therapy isn't for everyone. You might be thinking who does therapy work for? The interesting thing is as with most things....you really won't know if it is for you unless you try it out. Therapy may not be one of the tools you need for self-growth or to deal with your "problems". If you tried it out and it wasn't a good fit, I strongly encourage you to actively look for the tools or resources that will work for you and continue the journey toward living your best life! At times it can be hard but trust me the results far outweigh the work. Peace in your mind, body, and spirit is all worth the work!
For those of you that decide 2023 is the year you will try therapy, here are some tips to help. Finding the right therapist is like finding the right primary care doctor. The first therapist might not be the right one but it doesn't mean you stop looking. So how do you know you've found the right therapist for you? Here are two simple questions to ask yourself to help you know you found the right therapist;
Does this therapist have experience and or expertise with the reason/issue I'm going to see them for?
Do I feel like I can be honest with them/am I comfortable?
Of all the questions to ask yourself, why these two? Well in my professional experience, there are two common misaligned therapeutic relationships that can happen when you're not seeing the right therapist. So sometimes people find a therapist who is great to talk to but doesn't have the skill to guide the person in the right direction for their growth or inner healing. And when I say skill I don't only mean training or education but those things are very important. What are the signs of this kind of misaligned relationship? You have great conversations in your therapy sessions but you never work on or see progress in the goals you set. Or worse you never set goals at all. You feel better at the moment but see very little progress or no change (mental, emotional, or physical) in your life long term. This type of therapy dynamic over time can be confusing and frustrating leaving many to believe therapy doesn't work when really they are just in a misaligned therapeutic relationship.
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